Lonely Christmas

This year on Chistmas, I was spending it alone.

Nobody asked me out, which was not surprised at all.
So, atonishingly, I stayed at home full time from 24th's night -26th December.
It was a simplified Christmas which I spent by watching 5 episodes of latest season of CSI Las Vegas and some outdated movies in DVD which I borrowed from my friend.
Of course, these dramas and movies intersected by some afternoon naps and walk around the house.

Sarah Wilson said that "Christmas is like cheap pizza – all cheesy, intoxicating promise, but somehow (so disappointingly!) winds up tasting like cardboard."

and it seems that mine tasting worse.

2012 is coming. Counting down 4 days.

Happy New Year to everyone.

Write again soon.

Last in 2011

On 24th December, Wendy brought me to Jelebu Seremban for a run, which is known to be the last running event held in 2011, Larian Bukit Tangga.

I didn't know it was a 12km uphills until I got there, which I was totally bewildered.
And I was getting more stunned after the 6km because the uphill road were not typical slopes we have encountered. Contrary, they are far more inclined, almost 80 degree, far more inclined and long than our infamous Bukit Cinta.

I gave up after 7km, and started walking until the end of the Bukit Tangga. And I got 18th place which won a cash prize of RM50.
Fortunately, I have achieved obscure target set by Wendy ( 19th place) But she seemed undeligtful because I arrived at finish line after a few mid-aged women.

21st December A link to the past

I have made a new friend recently.

She's 20 years older than me.

If you had read my blog posts continuously this year. You might have read about her.

Let me clear out the clouds above your head first.

First and foremost, read this post first.

Sunday Life 18th April 2011

Then, aware of this paragraph:

It was a super great experience! Surprisingly, even auntie runs faster than me.
She came to me afterwards, to ask me whether did I train myself.
I said I was busy with my academics recently, and she turned out unhappy and accused me for giving so much excuses.
Gosh.....

When I wrote about this, I was offended by her a little for saying my statement was an lame excuse.

When I wrote about her, she was totally a stranger for me.

and when I wrote this, I had called her AUNTIE, no offense to her.

And this makes sense when I said she is 20 years older than me.

The second time I have met her was in Dataran Merdeka.

She was so fast in recognizing me by calling "Miss" from my back.

and then we got closer and closer since last month.

Her name is Wendy Wong.

She is a fast runner in veteran category and she won in most of the races and triathlons.

And last week, when she brought me to Port Dickson for participating Malaysian International Army Run,

it turned out that she won the 7th place which I did not win at all.

And many people there asking if she was my Mum.

Which cracked her up and offended her a little because she could not believe she looked like my mum for her age.

P/S: she is still single

And what I could response was" Maybe it's not you who look old, maybe I look very young."

She said this answer convinced her a little Hope she mean it.

And UM runners thought she was my mum, and they said something really funny:" you punya mak lari lagi laju daripada awak la." and "you kena follow mak awak".

You see, sometimes, things are so bizarre and things you could never think of happen out of your expectation.

Like Wendy and me. She becomes a mum-like friend from a total stranger who complained about me.

I have to admit, it's surprisingly amazing.

I'll be writing soon. =)

19 December

Arggghhh.
Super duper very very tired...
Legs are painful, my back is stressful..

It was a super shoker day.
I might have struck by some undesired events, which made me feel so numb.

I wonder how those Irongirls go through everything..

Zzzzzzzzzzz

15 December

The middle of the December approaches.

Time and Tide Wait For No Man

One hand up if you think time passes shockingly fast.

For I have seen and heard, there are two cases of people :

A. People who wants to live in the past, cherish all the things in the past rather than present or in the future. They want to go back to years before because they do not accept the way of their life now.

B. People who live day by day, and looking froward to what's going to happen tomorrow.

With Pleasure

Arggghh... I'm having 232 drawings to be printed out.. Busyyyyyyy..

I went to Varsity Lake to watch and support 1st Kolej Kayak Team on Saturday morning.
When I showed up at the shade where 1st Kolej Team was sitting. They were kind of surprised to see me.

And my ex-teammates which I had known them through last year SUKMUM were participating this year too. I'm so glad to see them.
Guess what?

They called me "Legend". " Ini Legend dah datang nie!" They said to others.
Oh...  I'm so glad I had that honour to be called LEGEND although I'm not that Legend.
I kind of amazed most of them with my performance last year. Thanks to my partner Peter Choo.
I had also gone through a lot to win from SUKMUM to MASUM although it was my first time to involve in kayak. It was not that easy as it looks.

This year's result was not as good as last year, I guessed it's because lack of training and guidance.
I figures when I got there that they did not even hold paddles in correct way. Sigh...
And mental is important, if you're not thinking to win, you will not win.
This is what I've learnt from authentic LEGEND.

With 1st Kolej Kayak Team 2011

Tomorrow will be an exciting day. Bless me.
Write again soon.

If This Was A Movie

Come back, come back, come back to me like..
You would, you would If this was a movie
Stand in the rain outside till I came out.

Come back, come back, come back to me like..
You could you could if you just said you're sorry.
I know that we could work it out somehow.

If this was a movie, you'd be here right now.

I'll be writing soon.

20 November

I'm so glad that we talk.

and

I'm so glad to have you back.


Thanks. =)

Penang I'm coming!

I'm going to Penang this weekend!!! Yeeehoooo!!!!!

So it's official now. Check the ticket below!

Haha.. It's going to be a 2 days 1 night trip only. Too short? Yeah, it's short. But let's hope it's gonna be a short but meaningful and full of fun! And it's gonna be a part of my memories.

Jeannie, see you in 2 days?

The purpose I'm going: Penang Bridge International Marathon.

It's genuinely a part of my wishlist since I was 18, maybe earlier but it became a must-achieve-thing clearer and clearer when I was 18 at Kedah Matriculation Collge. When I was there, there are too many North Malaysian especially Penangite in matric wearing the finisher tee and made me green with envy!

Now I'm gonna accomplish a must-achieve-thing in wishlist!

Let's hope the best of me and a SAFE trip. Thanks.

Going to write soon...

My First Malakoff Dualthon

Here is the time to write.

Oh Right, about Malakoff Dualthon, saddening me, my team lost.

My team made it in 7th place in Mixed Team Categories, right behind another UM mixed team which got 6th.

Another UM team for Men Team Universities Category got the 8th place. 

Puzzled and sad. Did we disappoint the UM Sports Centre, and also the UM students slash volunteers who were standing under the sun supporting us while they were dutying?

We were left behind other team during the cycling section, our bicycle was not the kind which is expensive and was not even mountain bike. The bike was rent from UM Sports Centre. That was why we could not catch up to other bicycle riders. And delaying timing. I ran badly too when it was my running time.

I was the last runner. It was very tiring. The route in Rimba Ilmu was very tough for me. I had had not enough training. This is the consequence. The route was a little inclined and I think my weaken mentality obstructed me to push harder. This is NOT GOOD.

I need to train harder. And this has crossed my mind.  If Amirul Syazwan can do it, so can I.

Thanks and good night.

I will write soon.

This picture again =)

Tomorrow

There will be a little race in UM tomorrow morning.

Malakoff University Duathlon Series

UM runners gang asked me to join them about two weeks ago! OMG!! So it's official tomorrow?

I am so nervous. My team participate in Mixed Team Category.
My team consists of two guys, Boy and Din and me.
Din and I are runner, and Boy will be cycling.

My team's target is get placing in top Five. Though they just wanna participate for warming-up for following races.
Hopefully we can do it, hope I can do it!

I am so regret for not training hard. Bless me...

Can't talk. Gotta go.
Write again tomorrow.

Weak

I always thought I am strong.

I thought I am independent, thought I am tough.

But in fact, I am very weak, although I hate to admit it.

I panicked when problems come to me, I couldn't solve it, I cry when I could not solve it, I called my Mum when I got a traffic summons and I cried when I could not unlock the car when it was auto-locked with the car key inside, and with the engine still turning on.

I could not even unlock it when my's father mechanic friend told me how to do.

What a terrible person I am. That's what nowadays people always call, "Noob" and "Sucks".

And that's when my mum said to me, " Be Strong." Crying does not solve problem.

 She's TRUE. I have to be strong. I can't be a little girl forever. I can't be a Mama's girl who calls Mum everytime I meet problems and expect her to solve it.

Be Strong, Siew Jye.

R word

It has been quite a while that I have not running.

I wanna run again.

I was almost there, but there were some obstacles that made me stumble over it.

I will try again.

Write again soon.

End of This Wonderful and Meaningful Busy Week

GRrrrrr....

This whole has been a really rough and busy week.
Yet, those days were so beautiful and wonderful.
And every single second of those days is going to be keep firmly in my mind and heart, like a permanent tattoo.

I would like to thank to everyone that had contributed and participated in this special occasion, from preparing the convo, attending the convo ceremony and also the convo dinner.

Well, I have to admit, I'm weary and tired, with all those photo session, outings and gathering. Because I'm totally energized to meet all of you and that's why so many energy consumed.

And not willing to let those moment run away, not willing to let you walk away so soon took very much strength and energy from me.

 Well,

天下无不散之筵席

I will miss all of you, VERY VERY MUCH!
And I have kind of started to miss you already!

Million thanks to First residential college Juniors!!

Thanks to CAD/CAM juniors. Thanks to my lovely all-guys buddy line, Jonathan Yap, Kong Kien Meng, Eric Lim and also Hoo Chin How.

Thanks to superseniors.

Thanks to Christine Ng, YongLing, and Windy.

Thanks to all of you for the awesome presents! I love them all very much =)

Last but not least, still

" BEST CONVO EVER!"

CAD/CAM Engineering batch 07/08

Woohoo~

My all-guys buddy line, from left, Eric Lim, Hoo Chin How, Kong Kien Meng and Jonathan Yap.

Thanks my lovely friends!!!

My dear friends~~~

=) =)

 Write again soon.

6th October 2011

Guess what?!
It's a BIG BIG day!
My big day together with all my dear friends juniors and friends.
It;s my CONVO day!! I'm graduated..

After this busy day, only 3 words to describe it...

" BEST CONVO EVER!"

Thanks everyone who was there for me =)
Thanks to all CAD/CAM juniors and First college juniors!

I Love all of you, and I mean it =)

Write again soon.

28th September 2011

Have you ever felt like seeing someone so bad, but in the end you ended up knowing that person was just there very close and you have just missed him a few seconds ago.

Have you ever thought if you could run faster, then you might not miss the chance.

And if you push yourself a little harder, then you would not have missed him/her.
 

Zzzzzzzzzzzz. Night world =)

Curious Friday: Memory

How much do you think the human brain can bear in the way of remembering?

I read it from" I Don't Know How She Does It" that

" Our long-term memory is basically this super huge storehouse where all the people and places and jokes and songs we have ever heard are laid down like wine, that if you do not visit a memory often enough, the route to it is lost, that the memory is far deviated. Like the approach to Sleeping Beauty's castle. "

Is that why all of the fairy tales are being told, being remembered about helping them to find all their way back?

Is that why people keep revisiting the same place, about trying to find their way back to the beautiful memory they once had?

Photo by Sarah Wilson

Happy Lantern Festival

Here I am...

It's Lantern Festival! It's a fun and interesting traditional festival. And of course, the tasty mooncakes!

and I still remember how we set up a little moonlight party downstairs of our residential college.

We gathered the mooncakes we had brought, made delirious chinese tea, lit up the candles around us, and also lit-up our lanterns and had girls fun time.

Here I am, wishing everyone a Happy and Merry Lantern Festival.

Don't forget to lit up some lanterns and had some mooncakes. Enjoy the festival! 

Things I Love Saturday

Brrrrrr~~ It's 3:20am on the clock!!

Well, it's over 12am now, it's Sunday now, more precisely.

But the truth is, I have not had my sleep yet, so it is still a Saturday for me.

I practically slept the whole afternoon like a dead fish. There were like one or two times I was awaken by bad dreams which I thought I were in it for real.

Then I fell back into sleep after making up my mind for a few seconds. Sometimes, I woke up and faced my laptop to take care of my Cityville, like 30 minutes, then I felt tired and fell into bed again.

I repeated these actions for whole afternoon until I realised it was already 4pm and I had not done anything for my Saturday, then I decided to finally get up for real. No falling back to bed.

I love to do nothing but playing Cityville, taking care my city and listening to my collection of good songs.

and my Nicholas Sparks seems to be a good reading material after I have finished a stack of books I borrowed from Christine earlier. I have not read a good book, a book totally unrelated to my academic for quite a long time since I had to spent everyday reading and studying for good grades for the past many months.

Cellyn Miin Yee was working on this beautiful Saturday. Her first Saturday. So sweet of her to come my place after work and bring me to a nice dinner. Well, that dinner place is nice if you are ordering those food more than RM16. But for people like me, which is currently having to control my expenses, have no right to have luxury food.

Old coursemate WenYar called everyone for a gathering which includes having drinks over the night. So we had the gathering at Millenium Square. Those faces which I have not seen for quite a while, but the truth is everyone is still the same. We spent our time having conversation about job, Boon Fui's Korea backpacking, Wen Yar's working experiences, English Premiere league, and blah blah blah...

I had a chance watching my favourite football club since I was 14, the Manchester United versus Bolton. Wow..Rooney had a hattrick and Chicharito impressed me with his amazing goals and the new handsome goalkeeper of the team, David de Gea.....

And now... it's time I end my Saturday with a good NIGHT sleep, which I hope would be a lot better one than my afternoon sleep. Good Night everyone, who is already sleeping cozily...

____________________________________________________________

ZZZzzzzzzzzz ~ I will write again~

Curious Friday Night

What kind of friend ignores you when you need her, and finds you if and only if she needs you for her fun time?

What kind of friend is she if she stands you up 9 times out of 10 when you were so excited about having time with her?

What kind of friend stands you up 8 times out of 10 without pre-notice and also post-notice? And you were so worried about what happen to her that you called her a thousand times, call connected but nobody's answering.

What kind of friend does not concern about you at all but she makes you listen all of her stories without asking about YOU?

What kind of friend embarrasses you in front of your friends?

What kind of friend never ever love you the way you love her?

_____________________________________________________________________

I will write again... =)

If I die young...

There is a song recently <If I Die Young> by The Band Perry

Remind me of the possibility of having such a short life.

and i realized there's good to express your wishes that you had not enough time to tell.

When I was around 17 and 18 year-old. It was apparently rebellion time.
And I was thinking of committed suicide, with all the pressure, stress, and problems that came abruptly to me.
But i soon realized it was just some extremely silly thought.

Life is short, literally short. Even if sometimes you think you still have long way to go. 30 years? Come on, 30 years happens faster than thunder.

Guts

"I'm going to work so that it's a pure guts race at the end, and if it is, I am the only one who can win it."                 --Steve Prefontaine

But, I just don't have the guts.

A piece of mind

Have you ever had a moment that you thought you'd figured out everything, only to see that moment slip away?

Have you ever thought you could grip a moment that you never want it to go away?

Yes. I have.

As everything starts to slip away, we grip it.

We grip wonderful moment, we grip our youth, and we grip everything we never want to slip away.

We grip it, with the intention to make it stay the same, stay unchanged.

The truth is, nothing stays the same. People and things keep changing as this universe continues to orbit.

But things are so bizarre.

As bad thing comes, you want it go go away, as fast as it could.

But at that moment, you don't realise, when you want it to go away, as rapid as possible, time also runs away rapidly.

And at the same time, you wish to keep your youth, your beauty and your belongings that you want to keep.

So.. how could time can do so many things for you?

5th July

I am going home...

Not ready to leave this place yet.

5th July

A free Iced Milo from third college mamak.

An unfortunate event brought me to this gardener working at First Residential College, 

he happens to be a dish washer at 3rd college.

Despite his job, I don't feel bad for knowing him. I still talk to him when we meet.

Then last night, I was there for burger, because I was starving...

Then the staffs there all were so nice to me. Wonderful smile.

For your information, I was kind of never been here. This is not my area.

I would only here when passing on my running route.

If I would have known they are so nice, then I definitely would come here frequently.

And the seconds I thought the gardener was asking me what drinks I have ordered, he mean what drinks could he order me, for FREE.. 

Hehe...

Lovely, isn't he? Next time, if we meet again, hope I could buy him a drinks too. Thanks.

Grateful Thursday

I am so glad that I was given a chance to fix my university life with things that I had not experienced before.

Even it's late coming, but they are indeed the best moments ever in my uni life.

I don't know why, things always turn to be so lovely when you're about to lose it.

Recent life here has been so great, I have met those amazing and wonderful person from mamak store cooks, burger sellers, gardeners, admin staffs, coaches and athletes.

They are the THINGS I should be GRATEFUL for.

Thank you, all of you!

Best memory ever!

29 June 2011

28 June 2011

Worst fight in my life.
Worst match my friends had ever seen

It's over.
MASUM is over. Goodbye MASUM.
There are hard and great times during this whole month.
But it's worth it.

First battle

Pray for tomorrow.

I don't want to let you down, my parents, my coach and everyone.

Bless me.

I am going to DO this.

I'll do it again, for mum and for all of you out there.

Good luck, Siew Jye! You can do this!

My teammates who're going to fight this together! Glory!

19 June

This place is getting more quiet than usual.
Fasa 1 UM team has off to UPM and their battle places.
A great good luck to all of them.
May UM team rule this year.
It was Father's day.
My family has come to celebrate.
Great time with all of them.
To my daddy,
" Happy Father's Day"

And it's late in the night. Tomorrow gonna be training as usual.

Good night.
I will write again.

11th June

 Have you ever checked back your chat list?

"chatting is 0
4 me
 no 0
 haha
1 day u faham y i was said no 0"

"nice
haiii
 r u busy now???"

Tomorrow going training at Putrajaya.
Nervous.

__________________________________________

Recently, what has surprised me most is people keep failing to recognize me for who I am.
They said I have become so dark, so dark until they can't recognize me.
And I've also found that this hair colour is not matching my current skin tone.

Confusion

To a boy,

I am confused. I really don't understand. 

All the things you did, and I thought...

But, it really doesn't matter anymore.

This song has been my companion these days.

Can't stop listening to this. Omg, Best song ever!

 

"Damn, Damn, Damn,

What I'd do to have you here, here, here 

I wish you were here"

Things you might 'LIKE'

It is raining pretty heavily with thunder roaring.

Jean (my current room mate for MASUM) and I actually are silently cheering for relief,
as the training was called CANCEL.

I come across with these great and helpful article

Sarah Von talks about How to tell people things they dont want to hear
Be a great friend with How to help a friend
Broken heart? Read these. Might help you. Get over a break up

The Ship I ride everyday

When most people around me is in a relationSHIP

I am still remain in this SHIP.

This Single-SHIP.

and being in this ship makes me having so many amazing people in my life and spending time with them.

Who is with me? Cheers =)

Second week

Today was the first day I approaches Karate-Do.

There are so many rules and different patterns to be adapted.

But I wish

I will be GREAT.

Like how I used to be.

Thank you to my Master Liu in Lanchang. Your words are still fresh in my mind. So hard to forget from time to time, for ever.

4th June 2011

Sunny Saturday afternoon, training is held as usual.

But it is going to be just me later.

I have a lot of catching up to do.

Hope everything is running PERFECT!
Hope that i will be GREAT!

Going to write soon. =)

3rd June

Do you care what people think?

Check this out. 

Not to care what people think

Enjoy your life. And love yourself more.

I will write again.

The second day

People said things will get better in the next morning.

But...

I woke up 3am in the midnight

Having this hard feeling.

The grief stuck in the middle of my throat. Just could not swallow it down.

And it did not get any better this morning.

But,

Someday, it will get better somehow.

That's what i always heard.

2nd June

Broken Heart

Shocker!

Today was just a bad day

Puzzled   Sad

What's wrong with me?

How could i end up like this?

and

I will write again.

28th May

I think

I don't run anymore.

27 May randoms

When a person who used to read your blog very frequently,

and now,

he doesn't do that anymore.

What happened?

征服Gunung Tahan

24小时前，从半岛最高的山，Gunung Tahan回来。

路途中真的好辛苦。在高山上，要喝河水，吃不饱的食物，一天还要走超过十小时的路途。

辛苦，真的辛苦。。可是，还是很开心能完成路程。

这四天高攀Gunung tahan的过程，吸取了很多教训。

很肯定的是我还不够training,还很脆弱。。。

除此，我也体验到人的自私和各种丑陋。。。

可是不重要，我还是不会用他们对我的态度对待他们，因为，I want to be a better person than you.

现在的我，双脚疼痛，左脚趾甲受伤，恐怕趾甲就快掉落。因为我们爬山路途很多沼泽地带。双脚长时间困在鞋里，没有空气流通，结果就发炎。

下星期有比赛，希望尽快康复。要开始training了。

“要想在众人面前有多风光，就要在众人背后有多辛苦。天下没有免费的午餐！我还要继续加油！”

22/5/2011 到达Gunung Tahan高峰

23rd May

Some guys, are just never meant to be your boyfriends. No matter how YOU wish them to be yours.

Some guys, too are just never meant to be your boyfriends. No matter how THEY wish they could be ours.

Which one do you prefer?

But some guys, I just never want them to be my boyfriend. They make promises damn so easily. Nevertheless, they just can't make it, never keep their words. And, sadly, sometimes they just never mean to keep their promises.

7 May

Grrrrrr...

Awful training...

Both my arms can hardly be straightened now..

Well, they CAN be straightened, but I have to endure great pain at my biseps...

And it's literally PAINFUL when I have to grab things more than 1kg, even a cup of coffee.

No joke T.T

 

Tonight will be an exciting night
~*~Good Luck and All the Best~*~❤❤❤

It's so Arduous

Exam week..
It's still a long way to go.
It's bitter and suffering.
FYP and exam together.
It's so killing.
But, please..
Don't die.

Minyee's status: 

Cellyn Miinyee 

Siewjye Chow 四年了，我们捱过了。。明天和今天一定要咬紧牙根，捱过它们！！ 

RIGHT!

We'll get through this! Crossing fingers firmly...

On this bumpy road to a “better life” that I ride everyday... I wish...I Could get through this!

Curious Friday

It was my first exam paper this morning...
Gosh... it was so tough... Bless me. T.T
Logged in my Facebook page after exam this afternoon,
According to the notifications, i was tagged into a post.
And it turned out--------------------a post by my best friend.

白雪不是公主 snowXwhite 

好心你 Siewjye Chow 换张 profile picture. 昨天我当媒把你介绍给我的博士 friend，你竟然吃着 lolipop ╮(╯_╰)╭

Sounds so ridiculous...

What's wrong with my profile picture? Is it really turning people off?
 By the way, Snowxwhite, Next time if you wanna recommend me to guys by Facebook, do check my profile picture first.
And professor friend? Seriously?? Then i guess the guy must be more than 30.
Snowxwhite, It's just her....Keep introducing her so-called guy friends to me. Like I could never get a BF..
And her trick just never work out.
 ______________________________________________________
I unintentionally found these photos in a friend's album.
They were not tagged...
The character inside these photo are obviously......Haha...

 
I guess this person interested in becoming a paparazzi.
His skills in candid shootings not bad...

Stop

Stop being so silly...

So silly to think this is true.

I guess I should learn to face REALITY.

25th April Random

This world is full of realism, more than you think.
If you think it's hardly believable, you are just not ready to go deeper part of this world.
You're probably still naive, too new and fresh to this realistic society.

Realistic people are uncountable. Some of them are born-to-be realistic. They just have this in their nature, from the minute they were born. Some raised to become a realistic person.Some people are influenced by the realism in this society. They are becoming a part of the realism because they think they have to be realistic to survive.

Sad, but true...

Write soon.

I had uploaded this same image before, but i found it suits more to this post.

Again, it's 5am now. ZZZZzzzzz

24th April 2011

My heart's racing, pounding in extraordinary fast rate.

Can you believe this?

The date is coming closer and closer.

So quietly, without your realisation.

I wish it is the date of success and biggest accomplishment, not the date of doom.

I have to SURVIVE  through this, no matter how difficult it is.

I WILL SURVIVE through this. 

SURVIVE, SURVIVE and SURVIVE

I will get through this!

I DEFINITELY WILL!

5am now.

21 April 2011

"To give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the Gift."

--Steve Prefontaine 

Sunday Life

I have come up a decision to join a charity run with my lovely friends.

Event: Larian Amal Shapadu.

Venue: Dataran Kemerdekaan, Shah Alam

Date:17th April 2011

Distance: 4km

This is my first time i join race organized outside campus.
I get the 7th place in my category.
It was a super great experience! Surprisingly, even auntie runs faster than me.
She came to me afterwards, to ask me whether did I train myself.
I said I was busy with my academics recently, and she turned out unhappy and accused me for giving so much excuses.
Gosh.....
Anyway,
Congratulations to Amirul Syazwan for winning.
And Thanks to him, for making this happen.
Thanks to Azrie too, for the photos. =)

I am tired.
I will be writing soon. =)
Good luck in final year project and final exam. =)

Nuts about Me

Something is wrong with me.
But what...? I can't figure it out.
I am a fool + moron.
Can somebody tell me what's wrong with me?
And don't tell me nothing is wrong.

Gosh....
I think I am going nuts.

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I am sick, No, I am NOT.

I am sick,

I am not sick.

I am feeling well,

I am feeling not well

I am sick,

I am not sick

I am feeling well,

I am feeling not well.

I am sick,

I am not sick.

GRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr...

Is it me or my body which is getting crazier and crazier?

I have this strange feeling since Tuesday.

I feel sick. All the symptoms of getting a fever approach me.

My exhalation feels warmer than usual, my joints all over my body feel aching, my stamina is getting worse and I feel sleepy and tiring. I feel not well when I am walking. And  I sleep extraordinary longer than usual.

It's suffering. But I am not sick. Even though I feel my forehead is in higher temperature inside, it feels nothing than usual when you place your hand on it.

Is it because of me being too worry to get sick or this obsession of thoughts about being sick brings me this whole stupid feeling?

Ahhhh... Okay, whatever.
Prevention is better than cure. So Jeannie suggested that I should drink some Chinese traditional herbal tea.
And there we were in the pasar malam earlier, in the drizzle, at a Chinese Herbal tea stall.
I chose to drink the most bitter herbal tea of the stall.
Chinese has a saying that, the good medicine is the one bitter.
Wow, it was hard to swallow, but i did it in disguise.

So I hope I would feel better tomorrow. And good luck for the presentation tomorrow.

Can't talk. Got to go. 
Have a presentation slides to work on.
I will write again. Good night.
_______________________

11 April 2011

I am feeling down.
This strange feeling gradually engulfs my body.
People always have this wrong impression on me.
Is that a wrong thing that I smile a lot?
I must confess that I like hiding my emotions. Except for the times that I really could not hide it.
When I am weak, I don't show to others.
When I am depressing, I act like I am perfectly great.
When I am sad, I am actually trying so hard to smile to your jokes.

Maybe you do always see I laugh so easily, I don't reveal any sadness in my writing.
That DOESN'T mean I am okay with everything.
I have my hard times too.